


Daily Random Touhou Shorts

by rlyehtaxidermist



Category: Touhou Project
Genre: Flash Fic, Gen
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-01-25
Updated: 2018-05-24
Packaged: 2018-09-19 19:16:16
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 14
Words: 7,985
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9456908
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/rlyehtaxidermist/pseuds/rlyehtaxidermist
Summary: A little writing challenge I've set myself; every day (or as much as I can), have a bot generate a pair of random Touhou characters and do a piece on them. These won't be especially long.





	1. Yakumo Ran + Sunny Milk

Ran's first suggestion that something was wrong was a shadow falling over her face. She snapped her eyes up, in the direction of the sun; her eyes immediately fell on a large bucket of water, seemingly appearing from nowhere in the air above the shrine's staircase. She traced the bucket's motion with her eyes. _Theoretical prediction, from now..._ Ran thought as she took a step up the stairs. Her eyes were fixed on the bucket. _, naively. Account for Newtonian drag; determine coefficient from pattern of non-vertical motion._ The bucket was descending now; Ran traced its motion with her eye, plotting its motion in the air with her eye and comparing it to her model. As she expected, there was no disrepancy.

A third of a second before the bucket should have struck the stairs four steps in front of her, Ran felt something heavy crash through her tails. The bucket clattered down the stairs behind her, and Ran could feel water soaking into her fur. She furrowed her brow in frustration; in part because she'd be waiting for hours for her tails to dry properly, and in part because she'd made such a grievous error in her model. She scanned the sky, hunting for anything in her surroundings that might resolve the disparity.

Eventually, she shrugged. She re-aligned her model, adjusting the initial conditions to match the proper trajectory, and fired off a burst of dense danmaku, saturating the region between (the projection of) where she first saw the bucket and the ground. A small, red-and-white figure dropped out of the sky, falling to the ground beside the staircase with a solid _whumpf_. The wings twitching slowly on the figure's back left little doubt as to what it was; so, she was the victim of some fairy prank. Illusion magic to move the bucket, and delay its image? Impressive for a fairy, all things considered.

Content that she had resolved the disparity, Ran continued up the stairs to the Hakurei Shrine.

Luna and Star emerged nervously from the bushes, picked up the thoroughly unconscious Sunny by her shoulders, and quickly ran away from the stairs.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> AO3 can't embed LaTeX. This is moderately frustrating to me, since the rest of my workflow is overwhelmingly LaTeX; especially when it comes to writing the vulpine calculator herself.
> 
> Yes, Ran calculates several models of motion for a bucket in about a quarter-second. She's Ran.


	2. Aki Minoriko + Ruukoto

When the Hakurei shrine maiden had first approached her, Minoriko was overjoyed at the thought of helping organise their autumn festival. It might just be because the Hakurei "couldn't think of any other autumn gods", but technically that made Minoriko the Hakurei Shrine's official harvest goddess! She'd be at the top of Gensokyo's autumn gods this year for sure!

The Hakurei had asked for Shizuha to come decorate the shrine, and left her mechanical woman behind to help with the harvest instead. Unfortunately, her idea of "help" was a little skewed. If she could find anything to say in her "helper"'s favour, it was that she was very enthusiastic about her "work". She had managed to "clean" nearly an entire row of plants, thoroughly crushing them, before Minoriko even noticed that she was carrying a broom instead of a spading fork. Thankfully, the potatoes themselves weren’t harmed, but if Minoriko had asked her to help with the gourds instead, they could have easily been smeared across the field.

"I'm sorry..." whined the mechanical woman, supplicating on her hands and knees in front of Minoriko. "You told me to pick everything up and I saw dirt, so my programming-" She weakly pointed her broom towards the former potato plants. "Lady Hakurei always tells me I'm not very good at cleaning..." She groaned, her eyes somehow filling with tears.

Minoriko reached down with one hand. "Don't worry about it." The girl on the ground looked up at her, eyes still watery, and took her hand. "I actually think I've got the perfect job for you!" Minoriko pulled her to her feet and led her around the back of her house. A large, wooden vat filled most of the yard. Minoriko led Ruukoto to the side of it; it was filled to near the brim with round, purple grapes. "Do you think you could 'clean' these, like you tried with the potato plants?"

Ruukoto stared at Minoriko, confused, but shortly set off in the direction of her broom. Minoriko yanked on her arm, barely able to hold Ruukoto back. "Is there a problem?"

Minoriko walked over behind the vat, and returned with a small, wooden footstool. "You don't use a tool. Just walk on the grapes until they're pressed flat." Minoriko smiled, pointing a finger at Ruukoto. "Think about it you're trying to pack a lot of sheets into a drawer, maybe?" Ruukoto looked back and forth between Minoriko's face and the footstool, and stepped up into the vat. Minoriko smiled up at her, and watched carefully, hoping she wouldn't need to correct too much.


	3. Yuki + Luna Child

It was a quiet day in Makai's Land of Ice and Snow. Yuki stretched her arms, then jumped and landed on her back in a soft, fluffy snowdrift, staring up at the black sky overhead. A quiet day wasn't really strange here; usually, the only people to cross the frozen fields were messengers moving between Pandaemonium and Makai's outer cities. Makai was always peaceful, whenever Gensokyo wasn't involved. Yuki laughed, slightly nervously, at that thought; at least Lady Shinki had managed to cordon off the worst of their last incursion. While it had been exciting to see the outsiders, she didn't really like the memory of being blasted through a hill by the witch. Or the big fight she'd had with Mai after what she'd said when they fought the shrine maiden. Or, well, everything about the green-haired youkai with the parasol. Poor Louise was still afraid of umbrellas.

Yuki was jolted from her thoughts by the appearance of a massive magical circle in the sky, followed by what looked like a giant wooden ship, moving slowly towards the horizon and Pandaemonium. Yuki jumped to her feet, flailing her arms wildly for balance, then lifted off into the air to fly up at the ship. It was still her job to deal with anyone who tried to approach the pal-

Halfway to the ship, Yuki was struck head-on by something only slightly smaller than her. She couldn't see exactly what, since her face was completely covered in some kind of loose, frilly cloth. Between the impact and loss of vision, she wasn't too surprised when she felt herself inside another snowbank. She felt around for what could pass for solid ground and pushed herself up; next to her, embedded head-first in the ground, was a little winged girl. Yuki grabbed her by the shoulders and pulled her out; she had blonde hair, curled in ringlets at the front, and a dazed look on her face. "What's going on?" The fairy only moaned, so Yuki tapped her on the forehead and asked again. "Where'd you come from? What are you doing?"

"Prank," murmured the fairy. She quickly shook her head a few times, then met Yuki's eyes with a rather flat look. "The dollmaker and the witch were talking about a vacation, so we snuck on that ship, but they caught us." As if on cue, two more fairies crashed into a nearby hill. The fairy looked around. "Do you know where this is?"

"Don't worry," Yuki grinned aggressively at the fairy. "I can be your guide." She leaned in close, playful malice plastered all over her face. "To a place where your soul can rest in eternal peace."

The fairy looked at her, her expression still rather flat. "I read about souls... I'm not sure fairies have them. At the very least we don't need to rest them."

Yuki sighed. "I'll just... take you to the palace. They'll be able to send you back to Gensokyo from there." _And out of my hair,_ she thought. _I'll never know how Lady Alice can handle all these Gensokyo people..._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> "Do random Touhou things," I said.  
> "You'll probably get a few characters you're familiar with writing," I said.
> 
> Urist, you memeing fuck.


	4. Ruukoto + Nazrin

Miss Hakurei was expecting guests. This was not an uncommon occurrence at the shrine, but it still called for preparation. Ruukoto had offered to help prepare the tea, but Miss Hakurei chased her out of the kitchen. Miss Hakurei did not like Ruukoto's tea, but Ruukoto knew she was improving. Her latest batch was even the right colour, which had to be a step in the right direction.

With the kitchen cut off, Ruukoto was left to wander the shrine's grounds, broom in hand. Many of the side paths looked very dusty, but Miss Hakurei had explained that they were "dirt paths", and thus it was somehow counterproductive to sweep them. Ruukoto was not sure what the point of a path was if it was always going to be dirty, but it was Miss Hakurei's home so Ruukoto supposed she had a reason.

Ruukoto rounded the corner of the shrine, and walked out in front of it. Ruukoto's eyes scanned the yard. The paved path leading to the shrine's doors and donation box had sixteen pebbles and eighty-four granules which did not match her memory of the paving stones. She readied her broom and walked briskly across the grass, plotting the optimal route to yield ideal sweeping angle and **SIGUSR1**

Ruukoto's thoughts halted. Her head rotated to stare at the main gate of the shrine. Ascending the steps of the shrine was what was, unquestionably, the largest mouse Ruukoto had ever seen. Miss Hakurei was expecting guests. Mice cannot be allowed to enter the shrine. Ruukoto rotated her broom to place the bristles over her shoulder, and compressed her legs into a sprinter's starting stance. She readied the servomotors in her legs and burst forward, broom held overhead, broadcasting her vermin alert siren, and shouting "Mouse!" to make the siren a bit more specific.

The mouse reacted instantly, drawing a spellcard from its mouse pockets and declaring "Rod Sign: 「Busy Rod」!" Two bright blue beams swept the area behind the mouse, filling the air with a heavy cloud of danmaku, then closed in on either side of Ruukoto. Truly, the mice of Gensokyo were formidable; her programming told her that normally the mouse should flee when approached. Despite this, Ruukoto was undeterred: The beams still left her a clear avenue of approach, and she was faster than the remaining danmaku. She raised her broom overhead and fired up the engines beneath her shins, leaping into the air and bringing the broom down for an overhead strike.

The mouse parried her attempted shooing with some kind of angular metal rod, at the same time leaping into the air, using the absorbed momentum from Ruukoto's strike to open the distance between them again. It landed a good way down the stairs. "Is this how this shrine treats guests?" asked the mouse, with its mouse words. Ruukoto was previously unaware that she spoke mouse, but attributed it to her creator's foresight. "Where's the shrine maiden?"

"Miss Hakurei is preparing to receive guests." Ruukoto brought her broom back up and crouched for another dash. "Mice will not be permitted on the shrine grounds."

The mouse put a surprisingly long paw up to its face. "I _am_ a guest. I'm a mouse _youkai_ , there aren't any normal mice with me."

Ruukoto eyed the mouse suspiciously. It had proven itself surprisingly capable so far; Ruukoto would not be surprised if it were also capable of advanced deception. She lowered the broom slowly, but kept her eyes locked on the mouse. "I will see-" Ruukoto was interrupted by a 'thunk' on the back of her head. She rotated her head around, and found herself staring into the eyes of a scowling Miss Hakurei, through a pair of shide, attached to a gohei which she had definitely just been hit on the head with. "Miss Hakurei!" Ruukoto said pleasantly. "I am currently engaging vermin which are-" Miss Hakurei withdrew the gohei and whacked her with it again, slightly harder.

"Does that look like a normal mouse?" Miss Hakurei asked, sighing and pinching her brow. "Ruukoto. That is a guest. Stand down." **SIGUSR2**

Ruukoto turned and walked back to the paving stones. She would have to recalculate her route given the changes in position since she yielded control flow. She rescanned the path; there were now seventeen pebbles and ninety-two granules out of place. She could hear Miss Hakurei conversing with her guest behind her, but it was not her business to eavesdrop.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The first repeated character is in the fourth chapter, and it's Ruukoto. rngesus pls
> 
> SIGUSR1 and SIGUSR2 are [POSIX signals](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Unix_signal), used to specify user-defined events that need to interrupt regular program flow. In Ruukoto's case, they're used to shuffle control flow between her normal routines and vermin-removal mode. I'd never write a robot without at least one POSIX reference.


	5. Kana Anaberal + Kurodani Yamame

Kana peeked around the entrance to the cave. The wind from deep underground howled past her, filling the air with the musty smell of petrichor and damp stone. She slowly floated forward, pinching the brim of her hat tightly. She let herself drop into the cave; as the wind blew through her dress, she grabbed onto it with her other hand, holding it down as she descended. The light filtering from above quickly faded into nothingness, and Kana conjured up a few glowing danmaku to light the passage. Finally, the descent began to slow, and Kana landed on her feet at the bottom of the 

The cave's walls were almost completely smooth, and composed of dark, brown stone; the smell of soil had faded, leaving only the scent of rock. A thin layer of water lent a dull sheen to the whole cave, and gathered in a small stream along the floor. Brown boulders were piled along the floor of the cave; some, usually smaller, bore the marks of being split by magic. She'd been told that the cave was more stable now, but seeing the boulders, she still cast her eyes to the ceiling and the passage behind her, trying to spot any loose rocks. Even if they wouldn't technically hurt her, it wasn't much fun to suddenly phase through something large and heavy.

She floated deeper into the cave; as it broadened, the wind slowed, and Kana finally felt confident in releasing her grip on her hat. Kana sent her danmaku out further, casting an iridescent light across the chamber. Somewhere along the way, the smooth walls had given way to ridged limestone formations, with pillars stretching from pools of water on the cave floor to the vaulted ceiling above. While the central "path" was mostly smooth, a small forest of stalagmites spread out from the far walls. She walked out into the centre of the room, slowly turning her head to take in the entire view; then, out of the corner of her eye, she saw a shadow move.

Kana yelped quietly and jumped into the air, gathering more danmaku in the air in front of her as she faced the one moving object. Standing just to the side of a large column was a blonde youkai girl in a brown-and-black dress. She was eyeing Kana with little more than idle curiosity, but had a hand down by her waist, presumably to ready a spellcard.

"Another rude visitor?" the youkai asked, rolling her eyes. "It's like everyone wants to come and go these days." She looked Kana up and down. "I don't feel anything from you, so you must be some kind of spirit. Did you wander out of hell?" The girl skittered up the side of a column, bringing herself roughly level with Kana. From how she moved, Kana was pretty sure what she was.

"The underground has very unusual spiders," Kana said, watching the other girl carefully. Tsuchigumo weren't common in Gensokyo; maybe because they all went down here? "But I'm not here to fight, or visit hell, or anything." Kana waved her hand and conjured the sound of a set of wind chimes, matching them to the pulse of the wind in the cave. "I'm a noise spirit, and I read a book about acoustics in caves, so I came to see for myself. Is that all right?"

The tsuchigumo shrugged. "You won't find much in the lower caves; sooner or later, you'll hear the oni down below." She pointed off to the side, behind the column. "If you can get through there, though, there's a spot sheltered from the wind that might be good." Kana flew over next to her, and followed her finger.

"Do you think you could show me the way?" Kana offered a hand. "I'm Kana, by the way. Kana Anaberal." She smiled.

"Kurodani Yamame." Yamame quickly shook her hand, then shuffled around to the far side of the pillar. "Come on, let's be quick. It's not far," Yamame smiled mischievously, "I just don't want to miss any humans while I'm gone."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This one fought me, not least because Kana (like most of the PoDD cast) is someone we know very little about, so I needed to come up with a lot of headcanon (even though most of it wasn't related directly to the chapter).
> 
> Before I get into headcanon tl;dr, there's one line I want to disambiguate: Kana refers to herself as a "noise spirit"; the term typically translated as "poltergeist" in Japanese is _sourei_ , 騒霊, which is literally translated as "noise spirit". This is one of those times that a line would make more initial sense in Japanese, but I only really speak English.
> 
> Kana's only real canon information is "poltergeist of a mentally unstable girl". While it's a stretch to say ZUN had the definition in mind when he was making the PC-98 games, Touhou poltergeists aren't actual ghosts, but more like artificial spirits, created by some means, of which the only _known_ method is Layla Prismriver's power. Going from this, as part of my general headcanon reconciliation of Windows and PC-98 canon, the "mentally unstable girl" of Kana's profile is thus not Kana herself, but Layla. (Exactly how, I'd need to ponder more, but at the very least Layla was agoraphobic, which is part of why she stayed in the family house.)
> 
> Going from here, the large western mansion that Kana haunts is the same one that's home to the Prismriver Sisters and various other poltergeists; the "owners" she's talking about are the sisters, who Kana had an argument with before the events of PoDD, prompting her to look for other housing. Since the PoDD endings aren't really compatible with each other, I go with Reimu's ending for the "canon", so after attitudes settled down Kana just moved back in with the Prismrivers.
> 
> Looking at Kana's PoDD lines, a lot of what she says is pointing out the "strange" or "abnormal" aspects of other characters. (With the exception of Ellen, who Kana thinks is cool for being a "real witch".) Going from this, Kana was one of Layla's earliest creations, out of her desire to have a "normal" friend other than her sisters.
> 
> The Prismriver Sisters we know represent Layla's vision of her sisters, and were created later, when Layla's power was stronger. Given this, their spirits are "stronger", which is why they can leave the mansion freely; Kana is fundamentally "bound" to the mansion, although she’s able to leave for short times. This could also be explained by the Prismriver Sisters we know being created from "echos" of real spirits (Layla's three sisters), while Kana was created, spirit and all, by Layla.
> 
> Damn this is a long author's note. I'm not sure why anyone read this far.


	6. Toramaru Shou + Lunasa Prismriver

Shou stared apprehensively at the decaying door. Somehow, despite the mansion's clear disrepair and at least one missing hinge, it was still able to stay upright and closed. A thick mass of ivy twirled up one side, holding the ornate doorknocker fast against the wood. Shou grabbed it and tried to pull it back; despite all her strength, she couldn't pull it loose from the wall. She shook her head, stepped slightly to her right, and rapped her knuckles against the wood. After a few seconds, the door slowly creaked open, revealing the remnants of the mansion's foyer behind it.

As Shou stepped into the mansion, the sound of music instantly filled her ears. She jumped into the air, snarling in surprise, drawing a laugh from somewhere to her right. She turned slowly, and her eyes fell on a blonde girl, staring at her with an amused look on her face. "My sisters are still practicing. Did you need to speak with us?" The girl looked Shou up and down. "Sorry, you're from the temple, right?"

Shou bowed politely. "A humble representative of Bishamonten, Toramaru Shou."

The girl returned the bow. "Lunasa Prismriver." She smiled at Shou. "It's rare to see a temple youkai this far from the village. Why the visit?"

"Hijiri has struck upon the idea of organising a..." Shou furrowed her brow. "I believe the term was _cultural festival_ for youkai, at the temple." Shou wanted to point at the source of the music, but after a moment of searching, she couldn't quite tell where it was coming from. Instead, she simply gestured aimlessly with her hand. "We have all been tasked with finding performers; you and your sisters are well-known for your music." Shou decided not to mention that Nazrin had scouted the house out for her.

Lunasa floated into the air, one hand cupping her chin. "Well, we don't know much Buddhist music." She twirled in midair, holding out her arms to gesture at her surroundings. "As you probably guessed. And we're not youkai." She floated her upside-down head in front of Shou's. "Is that alright?"

Shou waved a hand. "Hijiri is not concerned with the particularities of species, or the style of performance. It is simply her desire to showcase the peaceful talents of Gensokyo's population." Shou smiled sincerely. "The festival is planned to be in three months' time, if you need to prepare."

Lunasa nodded, upwards. "I'll need to speak with my sisters, but..." She poked her cheek with a finger, spinning around again to float just in front of Shou. "I can't think of anything we'd need to do then." She gestured up to the mansion's ceiling. "You know where to find us." She turned to float up to the ceiling, then stopped. "Oh, and if you're looking for more acts, you should try and find that drum tsukumogami. Tell her the Prismriver Sisters are still willing to defend their title," Lunasa smiled proudly, "if she's willing to challenge us."

" _Peaceful_ talents..." Shou said, somewhat quietly.

Lunasa held up a hand, and a ghostly violin descended through the ceiling from the floor above. "A purely musical challenge, of course." She took the violin in hand and began playing, perfectly matching the melody of the house's music. "Well, unless she starts something. Drummers, you know." Shou, in all honesty, did not know; she resolved to ask Nazrin or Hijiri later. Lunasa laughed and drifted up through the ceiling, waving farewell to Shou. Shou returned the wave and turned back to the door of the mansion, pushing it open and walking back outside.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Poltergeist x2 combo!
> 
> Mondays are pretty busy for me, so this is technically late. Time to play catch-up.


	7. Aki Shizuha + Yumeko

Shizuha didn't even try not to stare as she crossed the outer threshold of Pandaemonium. The palace's seamless crystal walls grew from the surrounding ground; despite their contrasting appearances, Shizuha couldn't find a clear place where one became the other. The entry arch overlooked a long, shallow descending staircase, fanning out into the strangest garden she had ever seen. A field of ornately-shaped glass spread out before her; the patterns carved into its surface made it look almost like a field, complete with shining, crystalline hedges and flowers along the edges of paths. Crowds of demons winded across the grounds, only to disappear through any of the palace's myriad doors. In the centre, a massive upward staircase was packed with a crowd so dense that it almost looked like a single organism.

"Miss Aki, I take it?" A voice from behind her asked. Shizuha spun around; behind her was a tall, blonde woman in a red-and-white maid's dress. "I am Yumeko." The woman curtsied. "I serve Lady Shinki as majordomo of Pandaemonium." Yumeko waved a hand, and the crowd rippled and shifted, opening a path across the courtyard to one of its gardens. "Did Lady Alice tell you why we called you? Shizuha nodded. Apparently, the Goddess of Makai had visited her daughter in the Forest of Magic, and taken a shine to Gensokyo's fall colours. Normally, she would have control of all of Makai's seasonal cycle, but instead she had "commissioned" Shizuha to "decorate" the palace at Pandaemonium.

Yumeko led Shizuha across the pavilion at a quick pace, the path closing up behind them. She stopped by a fence and motioned for another demon, dressed in work clothes and gardener's gloves, to unlink the fence along the path; Shizuha stepped out onto the jeweled grass, and followed Yumeko across the "lawn" to a massive, crystalline tree, whose branches spread all across the courtyard. It, like the rest of the palace grounds, was unlike anything Shizuha had ever seen. Rather than cracked, brown bark, the tree was built up from individual pieces of glass; each individual piece a smooth, geometric solid, but locked together in such a way that it appeared almost alive. 

Shizuha shot a glance at Yumeko; she was watching Shizuha intently. Shizuha took a breath and pressed her hand to the "tree"; in an instant, she knew that somehow, against all appearances, it was indeed a living tree, not simply a statue. "I think I can work with this." Shizuha said, floating up to the nearest branch and reaching for a paintbrush. She ran her hand along the branch, feeling the bundles of crystal that made up its "leaves" with her fingers. She settled on the first of the leaves and conjured her palette; she picked out a yam-orange, and set to work.

As she ran her brush along the leaf, the crystals jingled in her hand, causing a few droplets of paint to land on the nearby leaves. Shizuha smiled and drew out another brush, this time a yellow. As before, the leaf splattered the paint slightly as she ran the brush along the outer edge, but this time it placed some specks of yellow on the leaf itself, as well as its neighbours. With a few flecks of brown added near the stem, Shizuha released the leaf; the paint seemed to soak into the crystal itself, leaving it semi-translucent. Light from Makai's sun, passing through the leaf, left a splash of colour in the tree's "shadow" below.

Yumeko walked over to the coloured light and ran her hand through it, watching the colours dance as the leaf swayed slightly. She met Shizuha's eyes and smiled. "I will leave you to your work; I think Lady Shinki will be well pleased." Shizuha flushed slightly at the compliment, and turned back to the next leaf. This one, she decided, could be red and gold.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Another piece with an Aki sister POV and a PC-98 maid as the other character. Wew. Still running a day behind but I don't work on Thursdays.
> 
> Pandaemonium in _Mystic Square_ is shown as rooms made of blue crystal, so I lent this appearance to the fortress at large. Shinki, as a creator deity with an entire dimension of worshippers, can have her palace look however she damn pleases.
> 
> Yumeko introduces herself as Shinki's majordomo. The majordomo (derived from Latin _maior domus_ , roughly meaning "mayor of the house") is essentially a term for the head servant of a large estate or palace. The title carries a not-insignificant amount of prestige; in fact, the historical majordomos of the Frankish Merovingian dynasty were the true power behind the throne, and eventually supplanted their rulers entirely. While Yumeko's exact role in Makai is not given, considering Shinki herself says she is the most powerful of Shinki's creations, it would be odd for her to be a "mere" maid.


	8. Komeiji Koishi + Kisume

Koishi sat on a tree branch, rocking back and forth in the breeze. She'd only climbed it becauseit looked interesting, and flying was like cheating when it came to trees, but there wasn't really anything to look at. There wasn't even any fruit; what good's a tree if it doesn't have any fruit at the top? She'd even be willing to settle for an interesting-looking leaf. She plucked a leaf from a branch at random, but it was just a normal leaf. Koishi sighed, and moved to jump out of the tree, when another shape clattered down from the upper branches.

A blur of brown and green crashed against branch after branch, and finally fell onto the footpath below. A small girl leapt out, tossing around what looked like bones. One of the humans screamed and ran off the path, only to trip over a root at the side of the path, and continue his flight on all fours. Koishi hadn't been paying much attention to the humans, because she couldn't see any of the fun ones. If she just wanted humans who ran away screaming, she could get those anywhere.

Now that the falling youkai had stopped moving, Koishi could get a good look at her. She vaguely remembered her from somewhere, but couldn't place where. She seemed to be enjoying herself, which was enough to pique Koishi's curiosity. She stood up and flipped backwards, jumping from branch to branch until she was just above the path. She then leapt once more in the air and let herself flip over halfway, hooking her feet on the branch and swinging her head down to just behind the youkai.

The other youkai didn't seem to hear any of this, and was still happily tossing her bones around, until one of them smacked Koishi in the face. Now that she had a chance to look at it, it seemed like it was just wood, not bone. Koishi shrugged, still hanging upside-down, and tapped the youkai on her shoulder. For a moment she wanted to say _I'm behind you~_ , but she didn't know why. Instead, she just waited, a manic grin on her face, for the other girl to turn around. When she did, Koishi just stared her, bright-eyed.

"Can I play?"

As the little youkai ran off down the path, screaming, Koishi sighed. She had to find a different tree. This one didn't have anything interesting in it.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Short one, but this is all I really thought of here. I was challenging myself to do it with minimal dialogue, because it's fitting for these two I think.


	9. Kotohime + Shinki

_It was a hot, humid morning in the Human Village; the summer sun was already beating down like a rusty whisk. On a good day, there wasn't much police work to do in the village; unfortunately, that meant all the police work ended up on the bad days. It was the first sun after three days of rain, and that meant more than just air so wet you could drink it. Humans at home meant hungry youkai, and when the humans finally came out, that meant a feeding frenzy. And if it wasn't a youkai, it'd be a human; three days in the house, with nothing to do but count raindrops, could drive anyone a little crazy, and most folks in Gensokyo were already a little crazy to start._

_I slid open the door to my office and walked inside. Everything was how I'd left it, tea stains and all. The stack of papers in my inbox stared at me, sizing me up; I didn't plan to meet its gaze right away. Some morning tea, first, to take the edge off. Make that two teas; I already had the feeling that it'd be a long one. I smiled when I saw a steaming teapot, a pearl wedged in an oyster of paperwork. I poured myself a cup and breathed in; the scent of the tea burned through me, pulling me awake like a fish on a line. I took a sip and sighed. Some things are bigger than good and bad days._

_There was a call outside the door. The first guest of the day. I said to come in, and the door slid open. In walked a dame in a red dress. I'd never seen her before in my life, but I could already tell she was the sort of person who people mostly knew by reputation. She had a friendly enough look on her face, but she walked across my office like a queen on satin carpet. A waterfall of silver hair rained down behind her; a few red beads held up a larger spout, which bobbed alongside her head as she sat._

_She was looking at me funny; probably, because I'd been sitting here staring blankly for a good twenty seconds. Had she said something? As important as a good running monologue can be, they're a poor conversation starter. Just to be sure, I asked her to start from the beginning._

_Apparently, her daughter lives in the Forest of Magic. Unfortunately, that started her on a few minutes just about the daughter. I don't mind a family woman, but just being a doting parent doesn't usually end up with something on my desk, unless the kids cherished their independence enough to instigate violent rebellion. More than a few suggestions, and a fair number of unsubtle verbal whacks, and she meandered around back to the point at hand. Seems like the kid's house had been burgled during the rain; judging by what was stolen, either we had a damned determined librarian, or old rats were up to old tricks._

_Book theft in the Forest of Magic wasn't a new case. It was damn near the oldest one in the book; in the current pile, it was third from the bottom. From the look on her face when I described the likely perp, she was acquainted. Not a surprise; Kirisame went a lot of places, and always had the subtlety of a jewel-encrusted golden brick thrown through a stained-glass greenhouse full of pots, pans, and explosives. I offered my guest some tea; she declined, so I poured myself one for the road. A case in the Forest was just the thing I needed to get out of the Village before something else got dropped on the pile. I showed her out of the office, and showed myself the road to the Forest. Detective Kotohime, Human Village PD, had herself a case._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A day's update, actually almost posted on that day? _Witchcraft._
> 
> I'm not sure where Kotohime's perspective being pure private-eye monologue exactly came from, but this is my headcanon now. For proper atmosphere, I was listening to [this](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=U3asFBWqvEs) as I wrote this.


	10. Kurodani Yamame + Aki Shizuha

Yamame emerged from her cave, the wind from below whipping through her hair and dress. "All right, all of you," she shouted, gesturing at the small assembly outside. "People live here, it's not your leaf blower!"

Shizuha grumbled. "You try organising a falling leaves festival without something to make it more exciting..." Behind her, a small fairy tossed a large bag over Yamame's head and into the cave; shortly thereafter, a spot of red, orange, and yellow tore out of the cave, sending leaves fluttering down all around outside.

Yamame sighed. "Fine, but you sh-" At which time, she was struck from behind by a large burlap sack.

Faced with a blindly flailing tsuchigumo with a bag on her head, Shizuha decided to fall back.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Short snippet originally written in Discord chat.


	11. Doremy Sweet + Gengetsu

Demons were not normally allowed to enter the Dream World; mostly because they never entered as dreamers, and were very hard to get rid of once they did slip in. Not least because nobody wanted a repeat of the _last_ diplomatic incident involving Makai.

The baku of the Dream World had experience dealing with dreamers, but that was a one-sided arrangement. _Diplomacy_ was a different beast, and Doremy hated that somehow, her collaboration with the Lunarians had seen her placed in charge of it.

When she crossed into the demons'... holdings, for lack of a better term, she could feel the Dream World change around her instantly. She forced herself to stand ramrod straight as she felt a pair to of arms drape over her shoulder. "So, miss baku, what brings you to our world?" asked the demon, in a sickly-sweet voice.

"It's our world, technically." Doremy said, keeping her face impassive. "You'll wake from this dream one day." _Because you'll get bored and leave, hopefully_ was left unspoken.

"And if I don't?" The demon said, tittering.

Doremy smiled. "Every dream can become a nightmare." It was not a nice smile.

"Oh, I _like_ this one..."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The other short snippet from the 12th.


	12. Kochiya Sanae & Remilia Scarlet

It was shortly before sunset at the Moriya Shrine, and Kochiya Sanae was waving at the worshippers from the village as they took the last ropeway car down the mountain for the evening. As the car vanished beyond the shrine’s lower ledge, Sanae turned and walked back up the stairs. With the human worshippers gone, small numbers of tengu and kappa had emerged from the mountain’s nooks and crannies, and were beginning to file onto the grounds.

In the early days of the Moriya Shrine in Gensokyo, Sanae would be running between torches and gas lamps, lighting up the grounds as the sun set. With the underground fusion reactor, though, now she just needed to flick a switch to bathe the shrine’s grounds, and the ropeway’s cables and trestles, in bright electric light. It was hardly a “miracle" by anyone’s standards: even the human villagers passed down stories of electric lighting from before Gensokyo was sealed.

Still, every time she threw the switch, she could hear the gasps and curious mutterings of the shrine’s younger visitors as thousands of colourful bulbs flickered to life. Sometimes, more so than when she performed actual miracles, a fact that Lady Kanako was none too happy about. Sanae, or at least the part of Sanae that was still a little girl spellbound by a world of fantasy, thought it was fine, even charming. The tengu might be fantastic creatures, and more than a little stuck-up, but they still had kids who would fly to the top of the mountain at sunset to watch a few unfamiliar lights.

By the time Sanae crested the stairs from the ropeway station to the main courtyard, it was already filled with a small crowd. The visitors were mostly young crow tengu, with a spattering of white wolf tengu and, judging from the small, curtain-covered palanquin held above the rest of the crowd on the shoulders of four adult white wolf tengu, at least one great tengu. Hanging off the edge of the main crowd of tengu, a small gaggle of kappa chattered excitedly; tucked away in the distant corners and shadows of the courtyard, Sanae could even see a pair of tiny yamanba, under the watchful eye of an older woman with the most menacing knife anyone had ever tied a fluffy red bow to.

The crowd parted as Sanae walked through and up to the stairs; most of the tengu children averted their eyes or bowed their heads. The kappa barely paid her any mind, only reluctantly shuffling aside after some harsh-sounding muttering from one of the older tengu. She smiled at them all anyway, then slowly made her way up the stairs.

Upon reaching the top, she almost walked right into another child; at first, she thought the girl was a strangely-dressed crow tengu, before noticing that her wings were featherless and leathery.

“You are the one responsible for this event, yes?” the girl said, in a serious tone that didn’t match her voice in the slightest. “I wish to acquire a booth.”

“It’s not really an _event_ ,” Sanae said, smiling at the girl, “the lighting’s just something new to people.” She pointed over to a tree on the far end of the courtyard. “I’m afraid we can’t really set up something like a booth, but if you want to watch from a high seat, you could just climb a tree?”

The girl crossed her arms and pouted. “Well, event or no, my sister has somehow heard about the ‘spectacular Moriya Shrine lights’, and has expressed a desire to attend. I assure you, no tree could hold her back, nor would such a thing be appropriate for the dignity of our house.” The latter part sounded obviously rehearsed, and the girl smiled proudly up at Sanae as she said it.

Sanae fought back the urge to ruffle the girl’s hair. “Look, if your sister needs somewhere particular to sit, where she can’t cause trouble, I can keep an eye on her?”

“You would be better served entrusting her to the tree.” The girl shook her head. “No, if nothing can be done for your part, I shall simply have to attend this event myself, that I might report the proper details to my sister.”

Sanae couldn’t always read people very well, but she could definitely see a suppressed smile on the girl’s face. “Well,” she said, smiling back, “if you absolutely _have_ to, I’m told the best view is from over there.” She pointed to the wall at the left side of the courtyard, where the great tengu’s palanquin was now positioned.

The girl gave Sanae a polite bow and floated over to where she’d pointed.

When Sanae threw the switch, casting the shrine’s yard in multicoloured light, she could hear the girl’s amazed “Oh!” from the steps.


	13. Hieda no Akyuu & Reisen Udongein Inaba

Akyuu huddled under a heavy blanket in her study. She’d already abandoned work on the Chronicle for the day; her shoulders and arms were shaking too much to keep a grip on her pen.

She’d been getting sick more often lately; she didn’t really want to think about why. At least by now, the Hieda household staff could be ready with a warm cup of herbal tea and pot of soup at a moment’s notice. She wasn’t feeling especially hungry, but the spices infused the steam off the pot, and eased her throat just by breathing it.

Another violent fit of coughs struck; the motions first hurtled her forward, then sent her sprawling on her side. When she found her breath again, she slowly pushed one shaking arm against the floor, pushing herself back towards her pillow. She took a short, gasping breath and slowly exhaled, trying to drown out the sound of her heart pounding in her ears.

She didn’t quite manage to fall asleep, but she also couldn’t keep track of how long she lay shaking on her back, staring through lidded eyes at the ceiling of her room. Eventually, what attention she could muster was drawn to a sound at the entrance to the room; one of the older servants, an old round-faced woman, was standing next to a tall figure in a wide-brimmed hat and carrying a large case. “Lady Hieda,” the servant said, “we’ve brought the medicine seller. She says she can help.”

Akyuu slowly forced her elbows and hands down and, with a rough breath, pushed herself upright. She intended to say “that is fine,” but when time came to open her mouth, the best she could manage was something more like “tharsvin”.

The servant nodded to her and turned to continue down the hall, as the other figure approached Akyuu’s bed. Akyuu tried to reach a hand out towards her. “You’ll get sick,” she said, speaking slowly to keep her words clear. The woman shook her head.

“It’s fine,” the woman said, taking off her hat to reveal a pair of long, floppy ears, “human influenza can’t spread to rabbits.” She set the hat down leaning against the wall, and knelt down next to Akyuu. “Now, lie back down.” The rabbit ( _Reisen Udongein Inaba_ , her memory instantly supplied) gave Akyuu an only slightly forced smile as she scooched closer to Akyuu and dropped her case to one side.

Akyuu half-nodded, only for her head to struggle to come back upright. Reisen reached out and gently pushed Akyuu back down into her futon, nestling her head onto her pillow. Reisen gingerly pulled her left arm from the bed and rolled it over, holding up her elbow. After holding Akyuu’s arm closely to her face for several long moments, she set it back down and turned to her case.

Akyuu slowly rolled her head over to watch Reisen work. Even now, the part of her which was the Child of Miare was meticulously recording the contents of the case: various vials, some clear bags of fluid, and a metal apparatus that Reisen began to slowly assemble. Akyuu couldn’t consciously follow the assembly, but by the time it was done, it resulted in a metal pole on a wheeled base, stretching a ways above Akyuu’s bed; atop it were some handles and a few curved metal hooks.

Reisen drew one of the clear bags from the case and hung it on the hook closest to Akyuu, then attached some kind of clear rope to the bottom. “Relax your arm,” she said, “this’ll hurt for a moment.”

Sure enough, there was a sudden, sharp pain from near Akyuu’s elbow; she’d probably have jerked her arm back, without the mixture of the warning and the fact that she probably couldn’t. She settled for a muffled groan. “Don’t move your arm too much; it’s taped down but it’d be bad if it came out.”

Akyuu moved her head in a very slight nod.

“The eyevee,” the Child of Miare made a note to ask what an ‘eyevee’ was once this was resolved, “will keep you hydrated and fed until I can get some stronger medicine from Master to fix you up properly.” Reisen pointed at the bag. “Don’t let anyone touch this, and if you somehow get back on your feet, keep it with you.”

Akyuu nodded twice.

“For now, I’ll just put something in to help you sleep.” Reisen said, turning back to the bag. Akyuu’s hearing was just good enough that she could hear her mutter “Master’s wanted some proper results with the intravenous Butterfly Dream Pill, so...”

It’s the sort of thing Akyuu probably should have asked about, were she in a state to do so, but instead she just said “Thank you.”

“It’s... more or less exactly my job.” Reisen said, not even looking back at her.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is lowkey the first scene of the first chapter of _The Will of Heaven_ , an Akyuu-centric fic that at my current pace will be written circa 2028.


	14. Kishin Sagume & Himekaidou Hatate

It was a warm spring evening at Eientei; the clinic had closed for the day, and the last of the patients from the village were gathering outside the gates to await the shabby-looking woman who worked as a forest guide. As the sun slowly crept below the horizon, the moon had already begun its climb in the eastern sky.

As the moon had risen early, so too had Kishin Sagume descended. There was not any pressing business to attend to in the Lunar Capital, and while few others on the moon would admit it, the earth rabbits made a spectacular cup of tea, even if their mochi would never come close to the moon’s.

Perched on one of the mansion’s more distant balconies, she had observed the comings and goings of Earth’s residents with a suitable degree of informed indifference. The great variety of injuries and infections which infested the planet necer ceased to disgust her; while she conceded that Eirin and by extension Princess Kaguya likely understood the world better than she did, the idea of willingly choosing to live on Earth still left Sagume baffled.

She shifted in her seat, taking a final long sip of her third cup of tea in the last twenty minutes. She rang the small bell by her seat, and an earth rabbit appeared from some corner of the room to spirit away her cup. When no replacement was forthcoming, Sagume sighed and turned back to the vista; or she would have, had her view not been interrupted by a young woman with brown hair and prominent black-feathered wings lounging in the air in front of her.

“Himekaidou Hatate, Kakashi Spirit News. I take it you are the Lunarian, Kishin Sagume, implicated in the incident several seasons back by the testimony of Ms. Hakurei Reimu, Ms. Kirisame Marisa, and especially Ms. Kochiya Sanae?”

Sagume groaned. At least the rabbit had kept her mouth shut. In hindsight, she should have waxed poetic about them spreading her tale far and wide across Gensokyo. “The media have found me.”

“Is that an acknowledgement?” The tengu reporter flipped open a strange device and was frantically keying away at it. “And I beat Aya here!” She beamed. “Is it true that you interfered with the production of the first issue of Bunbunmaru Weekly? What intentions do you have for your influence upon future tengu publications?” As she asked each question, the reporter floated closer and closer to Sagume, her wings flailing enthusiastically behind her.

“I suppose that if I do not answer, you will continue badgering me with such uncouth questions.” Sagume stated, sighing inwardly at the girl’s enthusiastic nod. Sagume smiled, and feigned pondering a response.

Silence reigned for a few short moments, until the earth rabbit arrived with another cup of tea. Noticing that the balcony now had a second occupant, she vanished back into the mansion.

Years of practice concealing her reactions and thoughts in the court of Tsukuyomi nearly gave out, as Sagume was overcome with an urge to palm her face.

The interruption was enough for the reporter’s patience. “What is your connection to the residents of Eientei?”

“You are an extremely nosy one, even for your kind. Are you so rude as to believe anyone but the lady of Eientei will speak of her business?”

“It’s a reporter’s duty to pursue the truth, even when there is no clear way in which to find it!” Himekaidou crossed her arms and donned a proud, serious expression. “I don’t think she’d tell me anything, so of course I’m going to ask you!” Her bravado flickered for a moment. “Though obviously, I won’t demand anything private or personal. Unlike some newspapers I could mention, the Kakashi Spirit News is only interested in the public interest!”

“The truth and the public interest, then?” Sagume smiled. “Do you believe such things always go hand-in-hand?”

Himekaidou’s face turned genuinely serious for the first time since Sagume had seen her. “Of course. If people don’t know what’s true, how can they decide what’s right? It’s my responsibility to make sure people know the right things, so they can make the right decisions!”

“There is a saying on this planet,” Sagume said, pausing to take another sip of her tea, “that the truth hurts. You wield a great weapon carelessly.”

The reporter’s eyes narrowed. “Big talk, for someone who tried to attack Gensokyo with lies.”

Sagume kept her face level. She had faced far more troubling accusations from far more influential people in her time. “You have a fascinating imagination, miss reporter. You believe that revealing the truth and,” she tilted her head slightly, “attacking with lies are so different?”

“I think people deserve to know the truth.” Her face was a full glare, now; Sagume almost laughed. Someone with such little control over herself would never last in the court of Tsukuyomi.

Still, there was some ember of almost-familiar fire in the young tengu’s eyes; Sagume could appreciate that.

“Even if the truth will only harm them? It is right, then, to bring your truths to someone’s door, even if the truth would tear down everything they believe?” Somewhere behind that fire, Sagume wasn’t arguing with the reporter anymore. “If the truth would destroy the world, would you still tell it? If, for speaking your truth, the world would make you a liar?”

The reporter stared at her, now more confused than angry.

“I don’t know,” she said at last, “but I’d like to think I would. A world built on a lie makes everyone a liar. Just because people have always thought something was for the best, doesn’t mean it always will be.” Sagume had the feeling that the reporter wasn’t arguing with _her_ anymore either.

After letting the silence stew for a moment, she smiled. “Such a path will be fraught with danger, and may end in certain doom. I do not know if you are bold enough to walk it.” The earth rabbit returned, bearing a second cup and an apologetic expression. Sagume plucked the cup from the rabbit’s hand. “Tea?”


End file.
